Move over, Caitlyn Jenner. RadarOnline.com has learned that Richard Simmons is the latest Hollywood star to secretly undergo a sex change!
The National ENQUIRER broke the explosive news today with a jaw-dropping cover story that features never-before-seen photos of Simmons living as his female identity, Fiona.
The incredible pictures of Simmons, 67, with flowing brunette locks and womanly curves are photoshop-free. And a friend of the exercise guru insisted, “[This is] not just Richard Simmons in drag. This is Richard dressed as a softly spoken woman named Fiona!”
Well, to start with, BRUCE Jenner hasn’t had a sex change, he still has male genitalia and nothing will ever change his DNA. It takes more than a set of fake boobs and lipstick to make a real woman.
As for Richard Simmons, when I heard he was taken to the hospital for “bizarre behavior” my first thought was “How could anyone tell?” Most folks could be excused for thinking this sad little faggot freakazoid was always just an ugly woman pretending to be a man.
But at least ‘Richard’ (unlike Bruce) was willing to actually go the extra mile and have his ‘Dick’ removed and replaced with a ‘Fiona’ on more than just his driver’s license.
Even so, despite having all his ‘Bride of Frankenstein’ fantasies fulfilled, he doesn’t seem to be a happy camper. I wonder why not? Perhaps his real issues are more than skin deep.
I guess I’ll play it safe and set aside some disk space here at BlurBrain for the eventual and all too inevitable announcement that he was found dead some morning, the result of an “accidental” overdose.
Because as often as not, this is how these sexual ‘head cases’ usually end up.