Lindsay Lohan Hits The Skids

lindsay lohan gun

Today an email went out to everyone who’s anyone (which means not us) from Lindsay Lohan’s talent agency informing the world that Lindsay Lohan, a famous Hollywood actress, fashion designer and model is now available to appear at any event anywhere.

The email goes on to suggest weddings and Bar Mitzvahs. I’m thinking for an extra $50 she’ll even dress up as a clown and make balloon animals at birthday parties. Don’t laugh, have you ever seen her weiner dogs?

Well, at least she hasn’t stooped to hawking gold coins and reverse mortgages on late night TV, yet. However rumor has it that she’s currently filming a series of commercials for payday loans dressed as Pocahontas.

All joking aside, I got one bit of advice for anyone who does hire her to pop out of a cake at the office Xmas party…remember to hide your wallet and Rolex in your sock before you let her give you a hug.

Oh and keep her away from the open bar and buffet table. At Buffoon’s birthday party 3 bottles of vodka and a tray of Swedish meatballs disappeared into her purse.

1 comment

  1. Buffoon

    I told her she could take those things. I did some really horrible things to her in the closet.

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